I decided to start this blog after an epiphany during a long roadtrip. I tossed around ideas in my head trying to figure out what I wanted out of life. I’ve had the “Cassidy Be Brave” idea in my head for awhile. I want to be brave.
Sounds very romantic, doesn’t it? I’ve been clinging to that quote all year. But what does my version of brave look like?
In many ways 2017 has been, by far, my bravest year ever.
I think the common underlying factor in it all is that I’ve been honest about things I want rather than focus on what other people want of me or from me. And that’s really the scariest thing I can do. Be unapologetically ME.
This is difficult for me to admit because I don’t want to make anybody feel bad (oh, the irony) but I always have assumed that there is something inherently wrong with me that makes me less worthy as a human. And I’m admitting that not to ask for any sort of pity or apology. I’m just on a mission to be honest about who I am…even if I don’t really understand that fully just yet.
I’m terrified that once I uncover that person completely nobody will like her. Is she too demanding? Too vain? Takes too many selfies? Likes cocktails too much? Has too many tattoos? Isn’t kind? Isn’t trustworthy? I hope not.
This year has been pretty epic. Big moves, changes in employment, adventure around every corner, new cars, new found confidence. The changes in friendships are the hardest to take, though. I cherish people over experience or things and even though changes are part of the evolution of friendship, I will always fall back on feeling as though it was my fault.
All of that is to say, I hope to work through some of these feelings and motives and changes on my blog. That’s what it is here for, right?